i was just thinking about my future, and i got so scared that i was so close to crying.. maybe im just thinking too much on my part.. agh. i should have just went out today. stayed at home for dinner and what did i get? another lecture from my sister and my brother in law. how fantastic. i swear my brother in law is such a pain in the ass. he was being so fucking direct and mean to me just now. agh. so what if im not working at philips anymore? fucking hell. that job is so fucking boring and its not me at all. he was making such a big fuss. and now my sis and bro in law wants me to color my hair. (read, GET RID OF THE GREEN) but hell, its making me wanna rebel more. no i wont. i was actually thinking of coloring it all black with pink streaks the other day.... but now? im going to actually keep the green hair to make them even more pissed with me. im fucking 17. i dont need you to tell me what color my hair should be. i dont need you to remind me that im jobless now. and furthermore, you arent even related to me. you're only my sister's husband. and my sister? just want to ruin alllll my days by giving me lectures everyday. i dont need this. im fucking turning 18 this year.